The Fiver | Excessive wry smiling and reflexively arched eyebrows

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There were scenes of jubilation, disappointment and indifference this morning as the world of football came to terms with the news that this team would have to play that team and not one of the other teams in a competition. In the Swiss town of Nyon, where European football’s governing body, Uefa, has its headquarters, tests for a suspected nerve agent, demanded after several visitors to the municipality displayed signs of excessive wry smiling and reflexively arched eyebrows, didn’t actually take place.

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